Vulnerable and distant,
yet funny at times.
yet smart and witty always.
Didn’t care,
couldn’t value all the right things
and left.
Left us all behind.
Without caring,
without worrying,
without asking,
without trembling in agony
for anyone.
And what’d you leave behind for me?
Just an empty spot
for me to fill.
Just memories,
bound to be coloured
in shades of grey.
Just demands,
growing steadily
and remaining unsatisfied.
Just that ceiling,
falling in on me,
every day, all the time.
And I hated you
for a long, long time;
and I still do.
And where were you when I was hurt and I was helpless?
But now life plays games on me.
I observe myself
year by year,
day by day,
hour by hour
and I’m devastated.
I’m becoming you.
Your laugh I hated,
your breathing I hated,
your habits I hated,
your pains I hated,
your words I hated,
your hair I hated,
your tics I hated,
are now mine.
I must live with them now.
I must live with you,
without you.
your decisions I hate,
your actions I hate,
your heart I hate,
your future I hate,
never become mine.
I will live with you
all across my existence,
but not in my life.
You’ll be in a scene in every movie,
in a lyric in every song,
in a line in every poem,
in a colour in every painting.
You’ll be in the caress I’ll never get,
in the comfort I’ll never feel,
in the smile I’ll never see,
in the help I’ll never have,
in the embrace I’ll never be in.
But I’ll fight that tear,
I’ll try to hold this demon inside.
Υ.Γ.: Ξέρω ότι εν έshεις ιδέαν που εγγλέζικα.
Εν έshει σχέση.
Έτσι τζι’ αλλιώς, εν θα θκιαβάσεις ποττέ τούντο πράμα.
Maybe I should play God
and shoot you myself.
Tool – Jerk-Off

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